I have noticed a pattern. I tend to get a little depressed in the last week or two my children are in school before a break. It is so weird. I blamed my mini-depression last summer on fluctuating hormones. Now that I’m pretty stable I couldn’t figure out why I was so blues-ie last week, during my favorite time of the year. Now that I have all my children home with me all day, the clouds have lifted. I have more children to feed and take care of while cleaning and doing some last- minute crafting but I love it. Is this going to be a problem in the future? Does this mean I really should homeschool my kids? Am I going to be one of those psycho co-dependant moms who can’t let go when its time for the kids to go to college? I can’t figure out what this says about me. I function better when my kids are home. I think I’m okay for the first month or two of school. But as soon as there is an end in sight, I lose focus. All I want is to be with my kids and it feels wrong that school is keeping them from me. I think it is definately a problem.
December 22, 2008
December 22, 2008 at 2:28 pm
I can’t see that as a problem though. Rejoicing in kids being away is the bigger problem to me. It sounds like it just grounds you a bit, reminds you who you are and why you’re important.
And maybe there’s something about auto-shifting into a more productive gear. I’m still thinking that’s why mothers of 3+ kids seem to do better than mothers of 2 — something forces them into high gear as if they have no choice but to pull everything together and make it all work. Unlike me, with my two, I can let the whole operation fall apart as often as I’d like without immediate consequences. I can’t tell you how many days I’ve slovenly wasted because nothing was forcing me to stay on task. Removing the option to slack off – and hungry kids’ll do that – makes the day brighter.
I really don’t know, though. That was just a thought, and primarily only prompted by the comments that seemed to veer toward unnecessary self criticism. You’re a great mom. Lightyears ahead of the rest of us in the unselfish love you give your children.
December 22, 2008 at 11:29 pm
You are right about more kids I think. When I was a kid I babysat my (now brother-in-law)’s kids for a week. He had three at the time and one was a baby. I learned in the first day that you can’t deal with children and let the house be a mess. The children were chaotic enough, cleanliness was a must. Maybe most of the brightness has come because I’ve been able to shovel out all the disasters that have been piling up. And thanks for the compliment, that was exactly what I was looking for!